


Disco-able Me

by sunglassesface



Category: Minions (2015), Panic! at the Disco
Genre: I am so sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 12:13:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4786859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunglassesface/pseuds/sunglassesface
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bob the Minion has met the love of his life in Brendon. But one night, does he take it too far?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Disco-able Me

**Author's Note:**

> im so sorry oh my god  
> i didn't actually write this, my friend did so put the blame on her. everything is quoted directly from what she wrote. also the lube/condom list is, unfortunately, real

Today was the day. The day of no turn-backs, & no regrets. Because divorce is expensive as shit.   
“You may now kiss the MINION” Gru yelled.   
Their warm embrace. His soft, sweet, tasty lips and tongue. A familiar feel and taste.  
-  
I was online. My small yellow hands moved across the keyboard very slow. As I finished typing a thing I thought I’d never use, “What to use for lube & condoms when your poor?”  
A tumblr link pops up.  
“Strange Things to use for Lube & Condoms”  
I clicked on it. #NoRegrats.   
As I read through the Lube list I looked around, identifying to make sure it would work. I wrote down a couple that would work. “Blood, ice, human waste, lemonaid, milk.” Scrolling down to condoms area, I was surprised how much stuff we could use. “Tinfoil, plastic wrap, paper, tiny blanket, pens bound together.”   
Tonight was my turn to choose. Selecting randomly I went for ~Milk and Tinfoil~   
-  
Brendon lay on the bed, ready for me, blindfolded and all.   
“You ready? This is gonna feel different,” I said, pulling out the stuff.   
“Yes. Go ahead, I’m always ready!” he said. He seemed so sweaty and hot. Just like how I like my steak.   
Suddenly the drummer walked in as I poured milk on the tinfoil. I blindfolded him, handcuffed him, and fucked him too. I had them begging for more. I couldn’t do it anymore.   
Their ass’es bleeding, w/ milk dripping onto the bed.   
“I can’t.” I reply.   
“What’d you use?” They asked concerned.   
“Milk. And-” I was cut off.  
“Mmm. Milk.” The drummer said.   
“And tinfoil.” I finished.   
“WTF. Why. I am probably bleeding.” they said.   
“No, not a whole lot. but, you can punish me later baby.” I added wincing.   
“Oh we will.”  
I untied them. Brendon looked at me. He pulled a knife out his nipple & stabbed me.   
And the last thing I saw, was them making out, & Brendon flipping me off. 

(: The End :)

**Author's Note:**

> http://wtffanfiction.com/post/58751946361/lube


End file.
